User blog:M.A.T.S.H/MATSH's Rap Battles 5: The Crank Yankers VS Paige The Notepad
Hey there, everyone! So...remember when I said that I'd be making more rap battles...yeah. University caught up with me and all that but here is my latest battle at last! In it, Yankerville residents Niles Standish, Bobby Fletcher and Birchum from Crank Yankers rap against the "helpful" teacher Paige The Notepad from Don't Hug Me I'm Scared. Hope you enjoy it and make sure to leave comments and/or vote if you like it! :) Beat: Telephone Niles Standish: Normal Bobby Fletcher: Bold Birchum: Italic Epic Rap Battles Of History! VS! Begin! Crank Yankers (0.09): Come one, come all, because we’re having a ball We’re going to cause this little writing utensil’s downfall! We can’t stand her insipid blather! But it doesn’t really matter! ''' ''No, it doesn’t really matter! '''The thought of her rapping bowls us over with laughter!'' We’re taking over the airwaves ''while you’re stuck on a Youtube series!'' If you’re looking for Bad Things That Could Happen , then This Is It, sweetie! Your videos aren’t scary; they make me feel like I’m high on pasta sauce ' ''Why don’t you jot down this battle on your own paper? Remember this huge loss '''You got overshadowed by a butterfly and we’ll be squishing you like a pesky bee I’ll hunt you down like Bigfoot !' We’ll end this quicker thana sex session with Cammie! ' We’ll harass you for hours! 'So after we’re done ringing your Bell,' get ready for a big bill Because you don’t want to step to the hardest puppets from Yankerville! Paige The Notepad (0.41): What’s your favourite idea? Mine is beating up stupid crank callers You better slow down, friends because your fame couldn’t be any smaller! I listen to the voices in my brain; the only things you say are vile I’ve got the better British accent; you’re just an old pervert, Niles Birchum, you’re a trigger happy madman! Bobby’s just a stoned slob You’re not witty or creative; you insult minimum wage workers at their jobs! Nobody will SpoonieLOVE you by the time I’ve finished warping your small minds Now go and collect some leaves and sticks! Then arrange them into your harassment crimes These three haven’t been talked about for over a decade! You’re just blowing smoke No one cares about your calls, they only watch for the funny background jokes! Now Paige shall put down these pathetic puerile poor excuses for pranksters I’ll cut you down like a phone line! It’s the end for you little Crank Yankers! Crank Yankers (1.14): Don’t you dare hang up on us! 'Yeah, we’ve heard millions of scarier threats' I have a marvelous idea! We’ll cut her in half and into quarters, yes, yes? You’ll be as confused as Elmer and Helen when we’re through with you ''' ''You make me feel like Danny '' because you just make us want to spew! Your little psycho mind freak-outs won’t HELP you against this Nam veteran ! 'Hanging out with some talking clock, you’re fruiter than my cousin Terrence ' '''We’ll leave you dead! ''And bled! You’re more idiotic than Special Ed ! Special Ed (1.28): YAY! Crank Yankers (1.30): 'We’re the OG crank callers! Comedy Central ballers! There’s nothing left to be said!''' Paige The Notepad (1.34): I may be a notepad, but it’s the three of you that are the real tools You got cancelled from your own network, friends and from MTV, too ! You have no fight or bite; I’ll take your phones away and your life Because your felt filled skulls are even thicker than Birchum’s wife! Now when you look in this mirror: tell me please, what do you see? I see three losers who have already been forgotten in television history! Better hang up now because your calls just aren’t that persuasive Time to put the telephone down forever! Now, let’s GET CREATIVE! (1.57): WHO WON? WHO’S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC brrrring RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! Who won? Crank Yankers Paige The Notepad Category:Blog posts